Across the Wire II

Across the Wire still has me reeling from the experience.  I have always wanted to engage in some type of missionary-type work.  In the past I have always enjoyed volunteer work, especially when working with children, and thought that I gained just as much from the experience as the people that I was helping.  At some point in my life I would like to engage in a more serious form of service work that benefits people who really need it, such as the people of the garbage dump.

I do question, however, if have what it takes to do something like that.  As Professor Urrea says, poverty is personal.  The thought of getting lice and scabies is terrifying and revolting.  I feel like the shock of seeing people living in such poverty would make me emotional causing me to treat people with pity and unable to hide my disgust of the conditions, which seems like it would be offensive and not very helpful.  One of the events, that was a recurring thing, that would have troubled me and exemplifies this point is the accepting of food and drink from the people in their homes.  It would have been incredibly offensive to refuse the food, but the idea of taking someone’s last bit of food or coffee, especially when there is serious risk that I would get sick from it is a difficult situation to navigate. 

Another concern that I have (and meant to ask Professor Urrea about) is how to disengage from such work.  If I was able to overcome my fear and ineffectiveness I feel like I would have a hard time going back to a normal American life.  I wonder if Professor Urrea still visits Tijuana and how he feels going back there after achieving literary success and economic stability.  Realizing these difficulties makes Pastor Von an enormous hero or Jesus-like figure in my eyes.  I can understand how he has refused to learn Spanish throughout the course of his work in Mexico; it is probably the only way he can distance himself, slightly, and be able to continue.  Even for the people who do work there for a short time and never return, I’m sure the experience is something that never leaves them.

Maybe I’m not cut out for missionary work and should just focus on making a bunch of money so that I can be charitable.